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PAGE NINE — No. 5 The Uninvited Ombudsman Reports
by Alan Korwin, Author
My fertile brain is now developing a journalism concept that's never been tried. It is a single page in major newspapers ("Page Nine" regardless of the page it runs on), that covers the day's stories as they ought to read, not the way left-wing news rooms color things. Like FOX on steroids, but right down the middle, for the print world. It would be the most read page in the paper, a refreshing breath of clean air. Here's a casual sample (without the hard sweat Page Nine would really need). It might make you say, "They'll NEVER run that!" but the page will be built around ad revenues from right thinking mainstream businesses. A list of papers that have already adopted the concept will be posted shortly. Alan Korwin, Author
PAGE NINE — No. 5
Page Nine Is Now A Blog! Page Nine is now being published by
The lamestream media told you: Cindy Sheehan, whose activity has estranged her husband and entire family, and several wives of men lost in the World Trade Center attacks, are singled out by Coulter, and Coulter is being chastised for it by both Mrs. Clinton and news-media "experts" with access to huge audiences of their own. The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: Although it features similar elements to the Coulter-Clinton debacle, with chapters such as "Ruthlessness," "Aggressiveness," and "Surprise," in detailing the brutal tactics needed to dominate an enemy bent on killing you, editors everywhere overlooked it and featured the attractive, slim blonde's book instead. In other news, a new expanded edition of "You and the Police," a masterful treatment of how to handle a traffic stop or other encounter with police officers, was also ignored in the "news" media's rush to attack (or endorse) Coulter's work. Written by national provocateur Boston T. Party (the nom de plume of Kenneth Royce), the book offers suggestions especially for Americans who travel armed and may need advice on handling aggressive negative attitudes by some officials when it comes to guns. Both books are immediately available from Bloomfield Press (linked below), though the Coulter book is not, a point also missed by the national "news" media. ---------- The lamestream media told you: According to Associated Press writer Mark Sherman, criminal justice experts said, "the statistics reflect the nation's complacency in fighting crime, a product of dramatic declines in the and the abandonment of effective programs that emphasized prevention, putting more police officers on the street and controlling the spread of guns." Sherman goes on to quote James Alan Fox, a criminal-justice professor at Northeastern University in Boston, "We see that budgets for policing are being slashed and the federal government has gotten out of that business (sic). Funding for prevention at the federal level and many localities are down and the (National Rifle Association) has renewed strength." The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: Since at least the Clinton Administration, when attorney general Janet Reno confused reported crimes with actual crime statistics, "news" outlets nationwide have released FBI numbers without thought, investigation or examination of the data. Identical reports appeared in lamestream media everywhere. Reported murders are typically believed to be reasonably accurate, since a dead body usually accompanies the report. An unknown number of mortalities however are reported as murder, but likely represent self defense in the war on some drugs, with the survivor leaving the scene without filing a report. People who simply disappear, as many as 10,000 per year, are not included. Accuracy then drops precipitously for assaults, robberies, and particularly rape, where victims frequently refuse to report their ordeal to authorities. The NRA, the oldest and largest gun-safety organization on the planet, was implicated in increased criminal activity by so-called experts operating from Boston. No reason for the implication was given. Other possible factors affecting the data, including rehabilitation failures, recidivism, criminal training sessions among prison peers, untreated mental disorders, homelessness, poverty, the government education monopoly, inner-city conditions, gangster-lifestyle promotions in popular music, gangster role models from Hollywood, ultra-violent video games, the prison population size, the relentless war on some drugs, gangs pouring into the nation from Mexico, hopelessness among illiterate youth, parole and early release programs, one million fugitives currently on the loose, and routine corruption in the American political system were unreported. FBI reports failed to mention such factors, possibly contributing to the "news" media omissions, according to leading experts. The FBI did not comment on whether crime actually rose or fell, referring inquiries to their press release, posted on their website. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: Disappointment was keenly apparent in "news" reports nationwide when it was learned that President Bush's top political advisor was free to pursue his assigned tasks and would not be bogged down in lengthy and debilitating investigations avidly sought by the President's political opponents. CNN's senior White House correspondent, in an on-air editorial disguised as a news report, called it a, "get-out-of-jail-free card." (June 14, 2006). Whether the proposed charges against Rove were insufficient, unsubstantiated, groundless, not supported by evidence, fraudulent, manufactured, trumped up, not compelling, overzealous efforts by prosecutors, politically motivated or just plain bogus was not reported. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: A quick review of Hispanic television stations such as Telemundo, Univision, Mas and others shows the Spanish speaking but predominantly White elite that rule Mexico. The scantily clad blonde "jiggle girls," rakish tall male sex bait, macho announcers, gorgeous soap-opera characters and other on-air personalities are often indistinguishable from their mainstream White-TV-talent contemporaries, when the audio is turned off. The Diversity Code now enforced at many “news” outlets forbids mentioning these facts, and reporters face reprimand or dismissal for bringing up such issues, effectively quashing the subject. First Amendment protections for free speech do not apply, since most “news” outlets are not usually considered to be government agencies, lapdog reporting notwithstanding. Reporters who do notice the race-based nature of the illegal immigration problem are ostracized and branded “racists,” a false charge of devastating power, which can be brought against a person when no legitimate arguments exist. In stark contrast, illegal border crossers seen in newscasts, assembled at day labor centers and at other congregating places for illegal immigrants are uniformly from the short, swarthy, athletic underclass of mixed-blood individuals, decades ago referred to as Mestizos or Mulattos. Those words have been uniformly expunged from "news" language, in fear of possibly "offending" someone, despite historic guarantees of free speech. These people are from the largely reviled underclass of Incan, Mayan and Native Indian extraction, a point never brought out in "news" media reports about the "Mexodus" that often peaks at 5,000 people a day. Even conservative population estimates indicate Mexico has succeeded in exporting more than 10% of its indigenous Indian population to the United States, in one of the most racially oriented but covered-up acts of racism of modern times. The numbers of illegals who have found employment working in newsrooms, which have been struggling to increase their diversity for years, is unknown. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: The U.S. government appears to have little if any authority to take money from the public and give it to people who build homes in flood plains, hurricane zones, below sea level or other high-risk areas. Redistribution of wealth, from those who have earned it, to groups deemed in need of it, is generally known as socialism, a failed utopian system still attractive to many poorly educated individuals. An arch enemy of the American Dream, socialism is rarely if ever identified by name in the "news" media. It has been estimated that as much as half of the U.S. federal budget is currently given to various groups, based on central planners perception of need, in socialist programs sometimes called a kleptocracy. Some politicians wondered if funds should be handed out more slowly after future disasters. No authorities have been charged for disbursing public funds without apparent legal authority. No plans for charging the people who committed the apparent fraud have been announced. The ability of the perpetrators to repay the embezzled funds is unknown, not under investigation, and suspected to be non existent. No bad-debt recovery firms have been hired. Although racial overtones dominated "news" reports after flood victims survived, the racial makeup of the people defrauding the government and the taxpayers has not been released. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: Now, formerly ridiculed critics are exonerated for having pointed out that money was the real reason for the impersonal, fascist-leaning law enforcement effort that prevents those accused from confronting their accusers, and that safety had nothing to do with the program. "In fact," says one well-known observer who asked that her identity be concealed, "If the system works, and it actually stops speeding, the system fails, because it doesn't generate enough money. The system requires that people break the law for it to work. We told you so." In other news, Scottsdale City Court has processed 33,559 tickets from the cameras. Using an olden investigative tool called a calculator, at an average of $157 per ticket, the city raked in $5.3 million in cash. A percentage of the cash goes to the company that sold the program to the city and runs the cameras. In other news, doubt was cast on the system's reliability when the driver of a late model Sonata was clocked at 147 miles an hour, beyond what the car can do, according to experts. I am not making this up. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: Intelligent readers everywhere quickly picked up on the distorted translation, where God is mentioned twice instead of what Muslims would actually say, which is Allah. Some Christians were outraged at the sacrilegious, blasphemous and erroneous use of the Lord's name in connection with murderous Islamic warriors. The Post issued no correction. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: The number one source of revenue for Mexico comes from illegal immigrants who send cash back to their homeland, a fact that Fox (which translates to Zorro in Spanish) knows well. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: Less known are detailed calculations and scientific thought that suggests, given the incredible complexity of life and a universe of this size, it is unlikely that life would have arisen in even one spot so far. This theory recognizes, of course, that we do exist, and suggests we may be the very first, given how young the cosmos is. This would explain the complete lack of evidence of any other life in the universe, despite widely held beliefs to the contrary, and even rumors of cavity searches. If the earth's own example is a valid model, life begins at one spot and spreads, meaning we are the primordial seed for all population everywhere, adding value to Hawking's musings, and unreported by the media. The Foundation Trilogy, Isaac Asimov's science-fiction novels considered by some to be the greatest work of its kind ever written, is placed so far in the future that no one among billions of populated worlds recalls where the original planet was, but genetic evidence clearly shows all life sprang from a single point and spread. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: A letter from the Uninvited Ombudsman pointing this out was printed by the Republic, but no explanation or correction was released. Cost overruns from the delays were not mentioned. The rider subsidy for the system, once built, will be paid largely by people who drive cars, and is estimated by critics at $12 per rider, in addition to the fare. Critics estimate that each projected rider could be provided with a Cadillac for less money, and with no construction delays, which are having a side effect of bankrupting businesses located along the line during the massive construction project. ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: ---------- The lamestream media told you: The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that: ----------
Corrections and Clarifications 1. There's an imbroglio brewing over kerfuffle, as several Page Nine readers have insisted on different authorities for a proper spelling of kafuffle. The Uninvited Ombudsman has decided to use all the known spellings, and introduce some new ones, to avoid ruffling anyone's feathers.
---------- See the official Journalist's Code of Ethics here:
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Page Nine Is Now A Blog!
Now carrying or planning to carry Page Nine! Mens News Daily Shotgun Sports http://www.shotgunsportsmagazine.com The Ryter Report Wilson County News, Floresville, TX The Libertarian Enterprise The SanTan Sun (Phoenix Metro) Ed Phillips’ Arizona Almanac (Radio) NYS Rifle & Pistol Association Newsletter "The Bullet" Western Missouri Shooters Alliance
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